I may be the only person in the world who has a devotion to the 22nd Sunday in Ordinary Time Cycle A. I’ll admit it, I’m weird, but I do have a legitimate reason! Have you ever experienced indecision about a big life choice?   I went through a long period of denial and running away from the priestly vocation in high school. Then these readings hit me like a 2x4 to the face. On this same Sunday back in the fall of 2008, during my junior year of high school, it became clear to me that I would continue to run in circles discerning the priesthood until I finally admitted to myself that I needed to go to the one place that would actually facilitate
my discernment—college seminary.

Coming off a time period of running away from my vocation, Jeremiah’s words rang true— You duped me, O LORD, and I let myself be duped.
How did I believe that I could avoid the calling that the Lord had in store for me and the vocation that God had in mind when He created me? Yet, like the prophet, I still tried. I say to myself, I will not mention Him, I will speak in His name no more. But then it becomes like fire burning in my heart, imprisoned in my bones; I grow weary holding it in, I cannot endure it. It is not that God forces us to follow His will,
but His goodness draws us to Him. In our very nature, we know that He created us, He knows us intimately, He gave us our gifts, and He wants us to be united to Him and His will. When we know this, how could we even attempt to
suppress this? So, it is at this point we find ourselves at a crossroad. We can either let our hearts go numb and cold, or we can run to the Lord. I knew that I could no longer turn away. I had to run and follow the infinite love and mercy of our Lord.

Then, as if that wasn’t enough, the Gospel hit me—definitely more than a subtle nudge—two lines in particular: You are thinking not as God does, but as human beings do AND Whoever wishes to come after me must deny himself,
take up his cross, and follow me…but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it.
Despite experiencing promptings towards the
priesthood from God for years prior, I was still really good at listing all of the human and
earthly reasons why it wouldn’t work for me.
I never paused to consider that God knows me better than I know myself and He has a plan. He knows that it wouldn’t be all butterflies and rainbows—Jesus does say deny yourself, take up your cross, and follow me. Our vocations are not promised to be easy journeys, but Our Lord does promise that He will be leading us on the journey. That is where the peace of a vocation is found. Knowing that we are following Jesus—the one who called us, the one who knows us better than we know ourselves, and the one who has a plan for us. We are not alone.
 
So, after the readings at Mass on the 22^nd Sunday in Ordinary Time Cycle A in 2008, I knew that I at least needed to give college seminary a full year. Otherwise, I would be running away from the love of God, thinking as man does and towards a numb heart. Thankfully God gave me quite the nudge, and instead guided me to some of the most joyful years of my life at Bishop Simon Bruté College Seminary in Indianapolis and then major seminary in Cincinnati.  Now here I am as a priest. God really does know what He is doing!
 
God Bless!   
Fr. Jeff